Aug 30, 2013

10 Ways Having a Toddler is Like Being in Prison

10 Ways Having a Toddler is Like Being in Prison

You can't do anything without constant supervision 

Every morning begins with someone screaming at you to wake up 

You're always terrified something bad will happen when you're in the shower 

You're always terrified someone is going to crawl into your bed in the middle of the night 

Meal time is fraught with tension 

Someone's always watching you go to the bathroom 
You never get to choose the movie and then it's hard to hear it over all the hooting and hollering 

You're always terrified someone is going to punch, bite, tackle, stab or attack you with some kind of makeshift weapon 

Contraband -- like booze, chocolate and adult entertainment -- must be smuggled in and consumed in secret 

Conjugal visits are hard to come by, require intense scheduling, and are often interrupted 

BONUS: One Way Having a Toddler is NOT Like Being in Prison 

Being placed in solitary confinement is a reward, not a punishment
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