Feb 23, 2013

What Baywatch Teaches The World

 What Baywatch Teaches The World!

1. American men and women spend 15 percent of their days running in slow motion along the beach.

2. Americans almost drown an average of two times each hour.

3. Despite this habit of breathing water, CPR always works and no one actually dies.

4. People in the U.S. look thoughtfully at the ocean for an average of 15 seconds after being told anything of importance.

5. Americans never worry about getting enough to eat, but fat people are unreliable and sometimes evil.

6. Most American women have abnormally large breasts that are worshipped via close-ups for an average of two minutes and 13 seconds per hour.

7. When swimming in California, you are more likely to be attacked by jewel thieves or taken hostage by terrorists than drown.

8. Although Americans, especially lifeguards, complain that they are poor, they all own expensive sports cars and luxurious homes.

9. Most activity that takes place off the beach occurs in montages and lasts no longer than two minutes.

10. Motorboats, unlike cars, will not talk back to David Hasselhoff.